i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
