Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
My balls are so social today.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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