Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
