I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
We were destined to go to rehab together
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
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