you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
