I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Why are your pants in the freezer?
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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