Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
She needs sedatives and a leash
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
