i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
