I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
