Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
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