Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
