Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
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