Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
