well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
