I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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