That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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