I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
