Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
