I don't think brook has ever known best
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
