I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
