thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
im six kinds of drunk right now
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Is Oprah even human
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
