the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize