i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize