Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
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