"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
