atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
