I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
