What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
