Just mADE A PArabola og urine
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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