let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
