do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
