The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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