Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
