I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize