omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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