Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
