he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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