but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
We had to coat check the pizza.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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