He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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