Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize