So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Randomize
