Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
