So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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