yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize