watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
