i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Randomize
