If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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