They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
