Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Randomize