theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
its not stalking. its research.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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