There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Do you still have your period?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
